A treatment decision

After talking to surgeons in Olympia and Seattle at Swedish and SCCA, I've decided to go with SCCA for my care. I met with 3 doctors yesterday, the surgeon, radiation oncologist and medical oncologist. Although I didn't think it mattered, I like the fact that they are all women. My surgeon, Dr. Calhoun, is wonderful so far. She is very easy to talk to and has a great personality. I was also really glad to talk with the oncologists, since I haven't had the opportunity to do so yet. We are not sure yet that chemo is in my future.. a lot will depend on the sentinel node biopsy.

The next step is to get another MRI at SCCA next week. They want to evaluate the third area and determine if it really needs to be removed. Also, since my first MRI was such a mix-up, I actually feel better about getting a second one. This time though, I'm going for the Xanax!

It was a very long day. I checked in at 11:30 and we did not leave until 5:30. I've received a ton of literature over the past 2 days. Plus, my step-mom ordered a bunch of books for me that my regular doctor had recommended. I'm not sure when I'll have time to read it all, but it will give me something to do when I'm recovering from surgery.

Now that I've made this decision, I'm anxious to get the surgery over with. I feel like I've almost forgotten that I have cancer over the past few weeks while I've been busy moving and starting my new job. Unfortunately, that doesn't make it go away. I'm ready to move forward with my treatment and get into the process of healing.

too much information in my brain - massages - sick kitty

I suppose it's normal to go through bouts of depression... I don't know if I feel depressed so much as overwhelmed. There are just so many decisions to make about the profound impact this disease will have on the rest of my life. I am doing my best to keep all of these thoughts in the back of my mind, since I can't make any decisions now. If I let them consume me, I might as well just stay in bed all day.

I have noticed that I've been very forgetful. I forget to clean the cat box, I forget things people say to me. I forget to write down questions to ask the doctors. It's just too much sometimes.

At the moment, I feel like my head is going to explode. I haven't had headaches in so long and I just hate feeling this way. I will see my chiropractor this afternoon and she will help immensely. I also must remember (somehow) to ask her for a referral to a massage therapist who will be on my new insurance and is in Tacoma. It will be too hard to see my therapist in Olympia after I move.

I think I'm also going to see another massage therapist in Tacoma who I know of who does not work with insurance, but her rates are really good and I could get some extra tension-reducing massages.

I woke up at 2:30 this morning to my kitty, Mea, sneezing up a storm. You know cats aren't feeling well when they just lay there and let you pet them and don't purr. I gave her some antibiotics and I think I have enough for a 10 day course. Hopefully she will be feeling better soon.