Post-op follow-up

keep meaning to update but I keep thinking about it at times when it's impossible.

At my post-op appointment last week, my surgeon said everything looked really good. I don't have to see her for 6 months unless there is a complication. She did not take the drain out at that visit, however, she did re-do the stich and it was so much more comfortable. She did say that she spoke with my oncologist and it looks like I'll be getting 6 months of weekly chemo followed by 6 weeks of radiation. So, about 9 months of therapy. I'm still waiting to hear from SCCA to schedule an appointment with my oncologist.

I went back to work on Tuesday which was a little daunting, but luckily all I have to do is sit in front of the computer or look up info in my building. All of my current files have been moved to the building I work in due to lack of space at the medical center. It's perfect for me this week to not have to shuttle over to the hospital and deal with everything there. Tuesday afternoon, I went back to SCCA and got the drain removed. It hurt like hell to have it taken out, but what a relief! I was cautioned though not to do anything strenuous (including pulling my wheeled laptop case) with my right arm for the next 1-2 weeks. It's very hard to be even more restricted, now that the drain is out and I can do so many more things! I also had a massage Tuesday night, which was so wonderful. I haven't had a massage since March when I moved. She just did a full body massage to get my circulation going and also did a little work on my shoulders and neck and my left hip, which was feeling very lopsided because I hadn't been able to sleep on my right side. Now that the drain is out, I have been able to lay on my right side a bit, which is very nice!

When I woke up on Wednesday morning, I felt so good.. having the drain out and getting a massage.. I felt almost back to normal. I had ordered some new bedding, which arrived Wednesday night and I could not resist putting new sheets on my bed! So much for taking it easy with my arm. I need to though, so that additional fluid does not accumulate under my arm where the drain was.

I'm going to take it easy this weekend and I'm sure everything will be fine. Does anyone know of any good books about dealing with chemo?

Finally, some good news!

My surgeon called today with my path report:

The tumor is 2.5 cm
The micro-calcs are benign
The margins are clear
The lymph nodes are negative (except the sentinel node)

It's a T2N1 tumor and is Stage 2B

I don't know yet about the plan for chemo. My post-op appointment is Thursday afternoon and I don't think I will meet with the oncologist that soon. However, I expect to come away with a preliminary game plan for the future.

Otherwise, if this drain doesn't come out tomorrow, I may commit a crime!

Breast CA quilt

My step-mom and her quilting group made this beautiful quilt for me. To get good close-ups, click on the pictures to see them on flickr.

Tired of this

I just sent an email to my friend and realized it turned into a blog post for this morning...

I did ok with the heat, although yesterday was sooo hot.. 90 degrees. My mom is putting in a garden for me and I did a little physical labor with my left arm, trying to get the pond out of the flower bed out front. I got the plastic mostly out, but needed a 2nd arm to free it from the rocks and dirt. My friend came over and got it out and we started filling it with the various cinder and concrete blocks that the previous tenant had around here. The thing is about 4 ft deep! Mom is going to get some more soil, and she bought some herbs to put in it. It felt good to work up a bit of a sweat and I figured I need to get my left arm stronger anyway.

We went over to my brother’s yesterday for my niece’s birthday and I kept noticing that my shirt was damp under my armpit. For awhile I chalked up to sweat, but then I realized that I was leaking. For some reason, it’s leaking pretty steadily at the drain. All my brother had for gauze was US Army issue medic gunshot wound packs. It actually worked out really well as a big pad, but it was almost soaked through by the time we got home. I haven’t checked it this morning yet, but it hasn’t soaked through at this point. I am having fairly consistent lightening strikes down my upper arm and they are really painful! It’s weird that they hurt since I am fairly numb from my elbow to my armpit to the side of my breast.

We took the tegaderm off last night after I re-read the discharge instructions and it said to remove after 48 hours. When we removed the dressing from the lumpectomy incision, it took the steri-strips with it and started bleeding. I have a feeling that the scar is not going to be a nice one, but at least it’s on the underside of my breast. I am getting really tired of the drain and the dressings and all of this constraint. It’s frustrating.

The drain definitely feels like it’s pulling on its suture, and I’m not sure how I’m going to take a shower and let it just hang there. I can’t quite get the dressing changed on my own, although I’m trying. I don’t know how I can go back to work if I can’t even take a shower on my own and put on the aquashield.

Sorry, I’m full of complaints this morning. All in all, I feel good, I’m just frustrated and annoyed by the drain and the dressings and all of the weird sensations in my arm. Ah well, you did ask!

Several days later

This is just a list of what is currently happening:
Ok, I am definitely tired of wearing the velcro "sports" bra contraption they put me in after surgery. Not that I am going to take it off, but it's starting to really annoy me.

After a bolt of lightening went through the back of my arm last night, I remembered what Dr. Calhoun said about "electric shocks" going down my arm post-surgery. She didn't say how big they would be and that they hurt!

I'm also starting to get achy down the back of my right arm, yet somehow I am also numb. The numbness is weird, because it makes things feel strange and I was worried for a minute that my upper arm is starting to swell up. I don't think that is happening, or if it is, it could be drainage from surgery.

As far as the drain, the fluid is getting less and less and it's turning lighter in color. Almost to the "chardonnay" stage. Dr. Calhoun went over the colors of the fluid in terms of wine. ha! This morning the drainage was under 50 cc for the first time. I am pretty sure it will get down to the magic number of 30 cc before my appointment next week.

My throat is still sore from the breathing tube and I'm still phlegmy at times.

Today will be my first venture out of the house. My niece turns 3 next week and today is her birthday party.

My mom, bless her, is putting in a garden out back. I wasn't going to deal with the garden until next year, but she is determined to plant some veggies! It's been weeded, raked, mostly leveled and the rows are done.

post-surgery update

My surgery went really well. The unfortunate thing is that the sentinel lymph node did show cancer, so they had to do a lymph node dissection and I had to stay over night in the hospital. I'm home now and feeling pretty good. Hopefully the full pathology results will be back on Monday or Tuesday. My surgeon will call me when she gets them.

For now, I'm just taking it easy and hanging out with my mom.

MRI

If I never have to go through that again, it will be too soon. Unfortunately, when I spoke with my friend, who is a breast cancer survivor, she told me she gets one every other year. {sigh}

About the time I thought my left arm was about to fall off, I was told I had 9 minutes to go. I just kept saying "breathe through the pain" over and over and thought about my lovely trips to Hawaii several years ago.

I'm so glad that's over!

Surgery tomorrow

I haven't updated for awhile.. I think I've been trying to avoid all that is going on.. I reached a point a couple weeks ago where I didn't want to deal with it anymore, and why should I? Then I realized that is probably a very normal reaction to dealing with cancer and I'm sure I'll feel it again down the road.

My surgery is tomorrow and I'm definitely feeling a little anxious. I haven't been sleeping well the last several weeks, and although I have been seeing some of my friends and family lately, I'm feeling very isolated. I'm just really tired. I want to go to sleep and wake-up and have this all be over. If only that were possible!

I have to say that I am very grateful to everyone who is praying and thinking good thoughts for me. Knowing that you are there helps me to face the next challenge. As far as surgery, I am confident in my doctors of course, and I know things will be fine. But for today, I wish I could just stay in bed and hide away from the world. I'm leaving work early this afternoon and have to go over to the medical center for the lymph node mapping. Tomorrow morning I have to go get the guide wires put in, so the surgery itself won't be until later in the morning or even early afternoon. At least I get to go home tomorrow and not have to spend the night.

It seems like there is a lot of things I have to do tonight.. stupid stuff like bring the fans in from the garage because it's going to get hot, and put the garbage in the bin because garbage day is Thursday, but I need to get it all ready to go for someone to take it out on Wednesday. I also need to find some CDs I want to listen to during surgery and convert them to mp3s and put them on my iPod. They said I could listen to music in the operating room. I'm also trying to decide if I want them to use some healing statements. I kind of do, but I feel a little silly asking them to do it. Both my surgeon and the anesthesiologist have told me that they have done it before and if I want that, they are happy to do it.

I wanted to eat lightly today, but I didn't get around to making sure that I had anything light in the house. I've decided for lunch I will have a tuna sub at Subway and soup for dinner.

I also have to remember to take my work laptop home so that I can do some work later this week or weekend to make up for the 2 days I took off last week and for any extra time I might need off next week. The bummer about this being a new job is that I don't have much sick/vacation time built up.. only 18 hours.

Last week I ended up taking off Thursday because I could not sleep the night before. I was literally wide awake the entire night. Around 5 am I sent an email to my boss saying I wasn't coming in because I had appointment in Olympia later in the day and I needed to get some sleep so I could drive.

Friday was my pre-op appointment. I was going to work at the beginning and end of the day, but it just wasn't worth it for 2-3 hours. I still spent the entire day in Seattle. The meeting at SCCA went fine. It was nice to sit down with my surgeon and talk about how the surgery will go and be able to ask questions. It was in a very relaxed atmosphere. When I went over to the hospital to meet with anesthesia, that was completely different. You are just 1 person in a long line of people coming in that day. I felt like I was being processed. I was able to connect with the anesthesiologist resident when I told him about my experience at the simulation center a couple weeks ago. So, that was something. The nurse though.. it was completely ridiculous. On a positive note, when I went over for the chest x-ray, it took about 10 minutes.. in and out. So that was good.

I'm going to wear my "hey cancer" t-shirt tomorrow as my form of protest against having cancer. Maybe that will brighten someone's day.