MRI

If I never have to go through that again, it will be too soon. Unfortunately, when I spoke with my friend, who is a breast cancer survivor, she told me she gets one every other year. {sigh}

About the time I thought my left arm was about to fall off, I was told I had 9 minutes to go. I just kept saying "breathe through the pain" over and over and thought about my lovely trips to Hawaii several years ago.

I'm so glad that's over!

MRI issues / Cancer Documentary

I was scheduled for a second MRI on Tuesday at SCCA. I picked up the ativan at the SCCA pharmacy and took it before my appointment. Unfortunately, the bus was late and the techs couldn't wait very long because they had other appointments. I thought I would be able to deal with the fact that I was squished in the machine. The coil they use for the breat MRI is really high. The main problem was that I couldn't breathe by the time they got me in all the way. After a couple tries, they cancelled the exam.

The weird thing was that the radiologist came out and said, "Well maybe we can send you to Overlake or somplace that has an open MRI." Two things immediately popped into my head about that. First of all, I was told that an open MRI would not give enough detail. Secondly, the entire point of this MRI was because the radiologists at SCCA supposedly weren't going to read the films that I had done in Olympia.

I was feeling pretty miserable about not being able to do this, so I didn't ask any questions. I was really on the verge of breaking down a couple times. Luckily, the ativan started to kick in and by the time my sister came to pick me up, all I could do was sleep. I slept all the way home and then went straight to bed and woke up about 9 pm. Of course, I was up until 1 am and then had to get up again at 5! I have to say, I don't understand people who take valium or ativan as a recreational drug.. all it does is put me to sleep!

I talked to Dr. Calhoun's nurse today and apparently Dr. Calhoun is thinking about what she wants to do next. I did tell Laurie that it didn't make sense for me to go somewhere else for the MRI. If that's the case then they can use the one from Olympia! I asked her if she thought I might get an ultrasound-guided biopsy of this mysterious "3rd area" and she thinks that is one of the options. I won't know until Monday though because Dr. Calhoun went home sick today.

So the waiting continues...

Did anyone see that cancer documentary on PBS last night? I thought it was very good, but it did start making me feel nervous about my cancer. I'm starting to get more anxious about just getting the tumor out and finding out if the cancer has spread. I am very confident that mine has been caught early and hasn't spread, but I'll just feel better when I know for sure.

I did like the last 30 minutes with Linda Ellerbee and the panel of physicians who treat cancer patients and who are living with cancer themselves.

A decision

I've decided to schedule the MRI

Phone call from a new friend

I had gotten the name and number of a woman who just had a mastectomy from a co-worker. She was seen at Swedish and we thought she had surgery done by the surgeon at Swedish I've been referred to. It turns out that she (Beth) had her surgery by a different surgeon, but she was still great to talk to.

Beth told me to just breathe and be patient, even though I'm feeling so overwhelmed by everything. She said there is no point in seeing an oncologist until after I have surgery, which makes sense to me. All the oncologist can tell me at this point are potentials and options and possibilities. I don't want to hear any of that stuff. I want to have my surgery, find out if the cancer has spread, and come up with a plan. Beth also said to definitely get the MRI. It's important and probably the surgeon at Swedish won't see me without it. So, I think I will call the surgeon I saw today and see if I can get that set up. Actually, I'm going to email my family doc, who is on vacation until Wednesday to see if she should set it up or if the surgeon should. I'm also going to call Swedish tomorrow and just verify all of that. If the surgeon in Seattle wants an MRI as well, I don't see the point of seeing her until I have that.

Another thing she mentioned was a test called Oncotype. It's for women with breast cancer with a negative node biopsy and positive estrogen receptors. I have the positive receptors, so I'm halfway there. The test can predict the chance of recurrence as low, medium or high. Low is 7-8% chance of recurrence. That's what Beth has, so she doesn't have to get radiation or chemo. Even though I don't know if I qualify for the test, I am going to call them tomorrow. I want to find out if my new insurance will cover the testing.

We talked a lot about sleeping. I have been really surprised this week at how easy it is for me to sleep. I don't sleep that well anyway, but I've pretty much slept through the night the past 3 nights. Beth is the same way. It's a coping mechanism for the stress.

Speaking of sleeping, I need to get some. It's nice to know I have someone else to add to my list who has been down the road I'm about to go down and who I can call with any questions or if I need to express my frustration and upsetedness to someone who knows what I'm going through.