Tired of this

I just sent an email to my friend and realized it turned into a blog post for this morning...

I did ok with the heat, although yesterday was sooo hot.. 90 degrees. My mom is putting in a garden for me and I did a little physical labor with my left arm, trying to get the pond out of the flower bed out front. I got the plastic mostly out, but needed a 2nd arm to free it from the rocks and dirt. My friend came over and got it out and we started filling it with the various cinder and concrete blocks that the previous tenant had around here. The thing is about 4 ft deep! Mom is going to get some more soil, and she bought some herbs to put in it. It felt good to work up a bit of a sweat and I figured I need to get my left arm stronger anyway.

We went over to my brother’s yesterday for my niece’s birthday and I kept noticing that my shirt was damp under my armpit. For awhile I chalked up to sweat, but then I realized that I was leaking. For some reason, it’s leaking pretty steadily at the drain. All my brother had for gauze was US Army issue medic gunshot wound packs. It actually worked out really well as a big pad, but it was almost soaked through by the time we got home. I haven’t checked it this morning yet, but it hasn’t soaked through at this point. I am having fairly consistent lightening strikes down my upper arm and they are really painful! It’s weird that they hurt since I am fairly numb from my elbow to my armpit to the side of my breast.

We took the tegaderm off last night after I re-read the discharge instructions and it said to remove after 48 hours. When we removed the dressing from the lumpectomy incision, it took the steri-strips with it and started bleeding. I have a feeling that the scar is not going to be a nice one, but at least it’s on the underside of my breast. I am getting really tired of the drain and the dressings and all of this constraint. It’s frustrating.

The drain definitely feels like it’s pulling on its suture, and I’m not sure how I’m going to take a shower and let it just hang there. I can’t quite get the dressing changed on my own, although I’m trying. I don’t know how I can go back to work if I can’t even take a shower on my own and put on the aquashield.

Sorry, I’m full of complaints this morning. All in all, I feel good, I’m just frustrated and annoyed by the drain and the dressings and all of the weird sensations in my arm. Ah well, you did ask!